TWO BROKEN MARRIAGES #1--1966-1985--
In every marriage, there are ups and downs, when the downs become far greater than the ups, the party is over.At which time the blaming starts.In every he said she said situation, there are three truths, his, hers, and somewhere in between, the real truth.I'm going to try and find the real truth.
Lynda my first wife and I were married very young, she was eighteen, I was seventeen.My father had to get the license because I was too young.I had plenty of signs and warnings, that I was making a mistake, but didn't listen, I was a big boy and I knew what I was doing, so I thought!!the marriage was rocky from the get go.In retrospect I should have said, I don't.There were many many times I should have pulled the plug, my ego wouldn't let me.I had the arm candy I wanted and believed that with hard work I could overcome anything.The trouble with that was, the hard work has to come from both sides.The I has to be we!She was a hurt person and hurt people, hurt people.Did I love her, yes at first, but not enough, there was not enough love to carry the relation from the lust stage to the true love stage.I kept thinking I could change her, heal her, no one can unless the other person wants to change.The hate she had for males was so great, she later turned on her own boys.In our last fight, one of the things she said was,"it was my fault we didn't have any girls"I was in complete denial my head was in the sand, with a big target sticking up, and it was kicked over and over again.I was in just as bad shape as she was, I believed that I was so bad, that this was the best I could do.I didn't love me so how could anyone else.GOD hated me!and a few of HIS pastors told me so.Who was to blame,"the fool or the fool who followed her, I didn't find out the true depth of her bitterness, until after our separation
We had agreed to separate for seven weeks, until her birthday.The night before her birthday, she called me and asked for $60.00, to pay the back rent and that she would see me the next morning.I got into Hamilton around 9 am call her and told her I was on my way up. I arrived 20 min later to find, she had moved her boyfriend in the night before.I head into the tank and stayed there for the next five years.